Sunny 'n Ahmed

I've been in relationship with many galz all around the world,both
in-and-out . ever since i was in grade 7,now am a university student .
i've been in n out of relationships with countless galz . n whenever i
thought it was true love n that i've found my perfect mate,i start
talking with another girl n breakup with the one i was currently in
relationship with n start dating with the other girl . it kept
happening until i found out it was all an infatuation that i've
beenliving my life in . one day,tired of all these faken 'unrealistic'
relationships,i tried for a social networking portal on my mobile
phone . i had no such intentions that i would actually come across the
love of my life there .
i made a quick profile n sent some voice messages to a couple of
female profiles from around my city . nobody happened to reply to my
messages until one day i received a voice messagefrom a girl . i was
pretty excited . n Her voice tone n the way She spoke,meltmy heart at
the first sight. i replied to Her voice message n asked Her name,age n
location . Shereplied me back n told me Her name (which is a very
sweet one),n Her age (She jus turned 17 that time),n told me She is
from Karachi (the city where i live in Pakistan) but She's moved to
another city after Her father passed away . i asked Her whether She
use internet,n Her reply was no i dun use internetat all because to me
the internet world is totally fake . then i asked for Hernum,if She'd
give me We would talk on mobile n get to knw each other more better,at
which Sheagreed at once n in the next voice message She recorded Her
num for meto note down . We started talking . i asked Her if i can cal
Her at which She said no,She would cal me herself . well,She called me
that night n We started talking .
i asked about Her n Her family . She asked about mine . She asked me
whether i would tell my mother about Her n i said,yea,why not ? n She
was quite happie on hearing this . We kept on talking n We made a
really nice conversation . (am African n She's Pakistani) .
i told Her my father passed away 12 years ago,n She told me that Her
father passed away too 5 years ago :( We kinda shared the same
story,interests n likes from the very beginning,which now We knw We
both have almost everything in common :) i liked Her habit,how thru
the whole convo She didnt lied about anything n was quite
straightforward n optimistic about the future n stuff . after that We
kept on talking on texts n in the middle of the night,suddenly She
said "i love yu" ..
i was quite shocked at first . i said,did Yu jus saidYu love me ? n
She got scared . She said no,i mean i love yu as a frien .after that
She started crying . i asked Her n She said She was crying . i tried
to cal Her,She dropped the line n called back on my num . to my
surprise,She was really crying :( i asked Her to stop crying n talk to
me . i asked Her if She really loves me n while sobbingShe said yes,i
do really love yu . at which i said,okay,I Love Yu Too !:) it felt lyk
this was exactly what She wanted to hear n at once She stopped crying
n smiled nsaid,do yu really love me ahmed ? :) n i said yea,i do
really love Yu S*** :) She said,promise me yu'll never ever even think
of leaving me n that yu'll always be mine n marry me only n will never
ever even try to talk to any girl besides me . i promised Her all that
She asked of me n She was really very happie :) She was giggling n
laughing n She told me,i came across millions of guys in my
life,talked to a thousand jus to c what type of people really existin
this world . but never ever before in my entire life i felt this type
of affection n attraction for anyone .
i never thought i would ever love someone in my life n even that this
suddenly n even will get ready to marry him :) i cant believe i jus
found yu ! yu're the first n last love of my life ahmed :) yu're the
only one i've ever loved,n will ever love n i feel lyk am on topof the
world with yu by my side :) i was really very happie to have Her in my
life,it was my only dream which came true . She's jus two years
younger than me n She's a wonder,,seriously ! :) She told me,i dun
think i've done such a good deed in my entire life that in return i am
being rewarded with such an amazing guy lyk yu,,i blushed :p :) from
that day on,We started Our journey as two lovers walking on a same
path n then i told my family about Her . my mother talked to Her n She
succeeded in winning myfamily's heart too ! :) thenShe told Her family
aboutme n Our relationship n well ..
We're happily engaged now n planning to get married ryt after
graduating from university . which is roughly 4-5 years :) my whole
family loves,respects n cares for Her n vice versa :) still today We
talk about howWe met n miraculously fell in love with each other n We
both jus laugh about it n say seriously,We didnt even knew how it even
happened that We fell in love with each other all of a sudden but
whatever happened,nowWe knw it was meant to be n We're made for
eachother so no need to thinkback n lets jus chill n enjoy Our life n
jus wait for Our wedding to come then We got a whole lot of new life
coming up ahead of Us n i say yeah,definitely .. :) so,thiswas the
whole big story in short . i now believe that whatever i did in mypast
life was jus an infatuation i was living in. n i've never felt this
amazing n loved ever in my life before .
this is what true love is,tome . n now i knw it was Our destiny that
Our paths would cross n We would meet n fall in love with each other
lyk this nget engaged n soon get married as well :) i've been with
countless galz before but i swear on my life i never came across such
an 'Angelic Girl' everin my life before .. :) this is what true love
is . i still cant believe it but one thing i believe in n knw for sure
is that Good Lordhas made Us for each other n We were meant to be
together . i couldnt be any happier in my life than i am ryt now .
looking forward to spending the rest of my life with such a wonderful
wifey of mine. surely,to love n be lovedis everything ... :)

Where are you, my love?

I have thought of writingand sharing my pain for a long time. This has
been torturing me for months and I decided to finally share it with
you.
I know a lot of you wouldblame me and say that I am guilty, that if I
want I can end it all, but I am so deeply in love and I would do
everything I can to keep the man nextto me, even if I am
self-destroying myself.
I have a boyfriend for already half a year, it all started
unexpectedly, simply one introduction, one date, one conversation and
I totallygot lost in his spider-web.
Love caught me unexpectedly; I know youthink this can't be real, that
for half a year you can't be certain of the love. But I am so aware of
my feelings, this is a love you don't notice at first, it touches
gently thecoldness of your everyday life. It changes it fully if you
allow it.
There is another love thatcomes as a tornado and leaves only
unfulfilled dreams and remains of your living behind.
There is love that you wait for days, weeks, months and years…and it
doesn't come, and is doomed to fail to exist.
There is love that is uncertain to pass by the threshold of present,
sometimes does it, and sometimes stays in futureforever. But there is
also this love, in which I truly believe and feel, which even if it
doesn't happen changes minds, demolishes walls, does miracles after
miracles. It can be very painful at times; it makes you gasp for
breath, sometimes leads you ahead, but sometimes is blind. Sometimes
kills you in order to revive or get rid of you forever.
This last love you can't look for, ignore, nor challenge. When it
happens you know it is the LOVE... your life starts in another
direction, everything changes, evenyou are different. Well, that is
the true love.
I never loved anybody tillnow, there was love, I can't deny. I had
everything I wanted, but that great feeling of love was missing.
As I already told you, six months ago I met the man I fell in love
with. The problem is that our feelings are not mutual, I haven't
received as muchfrom him, something thatwould make me love him,no,
love just came over me.
I can say I have plenty of problems with him; he had a girlfriend
before me, whom he was 4 yearswith, his first love. But hewas cheated
on and buried and found it difficult to deal with it all, that's why
he doesn't trust anybody now.
Sometimes he treats me real bad, he had humiliated me to an extend
where all I wanted was the earth to open up below and swallow me, in
order not to feel anything and if I may sleep my eternal sleep. I
would never forget my last St. Valentine's day with him. I was
watching all my friends happy with their loved ones and I was hoping
for an attention from him, but he hurt meagain as usual.
I would never forget howwe were home and a friend of mine came and
said – Happy St. Valentine's day – I smiled and thanked her and he
turned and said – Happy to all but not to us.
I knew it, I've always known it, he didn't keep it a secret from me,
he told me he can't return my feelings, but I felt so hurt and sad by
his attitude. He can say everything when we are alone, but it hurt to
hear it being said before a friend. He humiliated me once more.
On this Valentine's day I didn't receive anything, no present, not
even a nice word. He always talks about his ex-girlfriend – his first
love – what it was with her. This makes me so sadand tells me again
that he cannot love anymore; he is incapable of loving anyone like
her. Not to mention that he always leaves me on third place, after his
parents and friends.
Frequently he would be mad at someone else, no matter who, and would
come and take it out on me and we would fight and I would have to
suffer for someone else's mistake. If he had problems with someone
Iwas to blame.
And I always endure everything in the name of my love. He hurt me and
he still is hurting me,but I learnt how to accept things as they are.I
forgive him every time, but I get nothing in return. There were times
when we would argue and it is his entire fault, but in order to get
thingsback to normal I would admit it was my mistake, I would
apologize, when in reality there is nothingto apologize for.
I have always treated everyone well. I don't mean to say I am special,
but I would think before doing something that would hurt someone,
thisis so egoistical.
I don't know where I did wrong, but now when I met the man I fell in
love with, the man I breathe for and love… And he treats me so bad and
humiliates me so meanly. Whose mistakes am I redeeming, I don't
know,what I know is that I am destroying myself, and still I continue
doing it. I know today he is with me and tomorrow- he might be gone. I
don't want much of him, simplyto respect me, to be kind to me. This
much I need to be happy.
I have one more problem; I am not well with my nerves, I have a weak
nervous system. It all started with how much I was hurt in the past
and I continue to be.I am quite dependant on sedatives, I can't
functionwithout them. I cry, I suffer, it hurts, I am humiliated, I
drink my pills – that is what my lifeis. I wait every single day that
my love would remember I am there, he would be with me, I wait to see
his false smile or even a mean lie, but told by him, I wait to be
humiliated once more, but to be with him, I am so afraid to lose him.
It hurts me, but I am telling myself, it is once in a lifetime that a
person experiences this love, and it's worth it. Every sacrifice,
every possible or impossible price, every breath and every moment of
our fragile existence. Even if this love devastates our hearts
forever....

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He is asking about the virtues of the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah

Are the first ten days of Dhu'l-Hijjah more specialthan other days?
What are the righteous deeds that it is recommended to do a lot of
during these ten days?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Among the great seasonsof worship are the first ten days of
Dhu'l-Hijjah, which Allaah has favoured over other days. It was
narrated from Ibn 'Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There are
no days on which righteous deeds are more beloved to Allaah than these
ten days." They said: "Not even jihad for the sake of Allaah?" He
said: "Not even jihad for the sake of Allaah, unless a man goes out
himself for jihad taking his wealth with him and does not come back
with anything." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2/457
It was also narrated from Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) that
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There
is no deed that is better before Allaah or more greatly rewarded than
a good deed done in the (first) ten days of al-Adha." It was said:
"Not even jihad for the sake of Allaah?" He said: "Not even jihad for
the sake of Allaah, unless a man goes out himself forjihad taking his
wealth with him and does not come back with anything." Narrated by
al-Daarimi, 1/357; its isnaad is hasan as stated in al-Irwa', 3/398.
These texts and others indicate that these ten days are better than
all other days of the year, with no exception, even the last ten days
of Ramadaan. But the last ten nights of Ramadaan are better than the
first ten nights of Dhu'l-Hijjah, because they include Laylat al-Qadr,
which is better than a thousand months. See Tafseer Ibn Katheer,
5/412.
So the Muslim should start these days with sincere repentance to
Allaah, then he should do a lot of righteous deeds in general, then he
should pay attention to doing the following deeds:
1 – Fasting
It is Sunnah for the Muslim to fast on the first nine days of
Dhu'l-Hijjah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) encouraged us to do righteous deedsin the first ten days of
Dhu'l-Hijjah, and fasting is one of the best of deeds, which Allaah
has chosen for Himself as it says in the hadeeth qudsi: "Allaah says:
'All the deeds of the son of Adam are for him, exceptfasting, which is
for Me and I shall reward for it."Narrated by al-Bukhaari,1805.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to fast
on the first nine days of Dhu'l-Hijjah. It was narrated from
Hunaydahibn Khaalid from his wife, that one of the wives of the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: The Prophet
(peaceand blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to fast on the first
nine days of Dhu'l-Hijjah and the day of 'Ashoora', andthree days each
month, the first Monday of the month and two Thursdays. Narrated by
al-Nasaa'i, 4/205 and by Abu Dawood; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani
in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 2/462.
2 – Reciting tahmeed, tahleel and takbeer a great deal
It is Sunnah to recite takbeer (saying Allaahu akbar (Allaah is most
great)), tahmeed (sayingal-hamdu Lillah (praise be to Allaah)),
tahleel (saying Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah (There is no god but Allaah))
and tasbeeh (saying Subhaan-Allaah (Glory be to Allaah)), during
thefirst ten days of Dhu'l-Hijjah, saying these words out loud in the
mosques, homes, streets and every place in whichit is permissible to
remember Allaah, to perform this act of worship openly and proclaim
the greatness of Allaah.
Men should recite out loud and women should recite quietly.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"That they may witness things that are of benefit to them (i.e. reward
of Hajj in the Hereafter, and also someworldly gain from trade), and
mention the Name of Allaah on appointed days, over thebeast of cattle
that He has provided for them (for sacrifice)"
[al-Hajj 22:28]
The majority are of the view that the "appointed days" are the first
ten days of Dhu'l-Hijjah, because it was narrated from Ibn 'Abbaas
(may Allaah be pleased with him) that the appointed days are the first
ten days of Dhu'l-Hijjah.
It was narrated from 'Abd-Allaah ibn 'Umar (may Allaah be pleased
with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: "There are no days that are greater before Allaah or in which
good deeds aremore beloved to Him, than these ten days, so recite a
great deal of tahleel, takbeer and tahmeed during them." Narrated by
Ahmad, 7/224; its isnaad was classed as saheeh by Ahmad Shaakir.
The takbeer is as follows:
Allaah akbar, Allaahu akbar, laa ilaaha ill-Allaah, Allaahu akbar, wa
Lillaah il-hamd (Allaah is Most Great, Allaah is Most Great, there is
no god but Allaah; Allaah is Most Great and to Allaah be praise).
And there are other versions.
This takbeer has becomea forsaken Sunnah nowadays, especially at the
beginning of these ten days. You can hardly hear it except from a few.
It should be recited out loud, so as to revive the Sunnah and remind
the heedless. It was proven that Ibn 'Umar and Abu Hurayrah (may
Allaah be pleased with them both) used to go out to the marketplace
during the first ten days of Dhu'l-Hijjah, reciting the takbeer our
loud, and the people would recite takbeer when they heard them, i.e.,
thepeople would rememberthe talkbeer and each one would recite it by
himself; it does not mean that they recited in unison – that is not
prescribed in sharee'ah.
Reviving Sunnahs that have been forgotten brings a great deal of
reward, as is indicated by the words of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Whoever revives one of my Sunnahs
that has died out after I am gone, will have a reward like that of
everyone who does it,without that detracting from their reward in the
slightest." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 7/443; this hadeeth is hasan
because of corroborating reports.
3 – Doing Hajj and 'Umrah
One of the greatest deeds that can be done during these ten days is
Hajj to the sacred House of Allaah. Whoever Allaah helps to go on Hajj
to His House and do the rituals in the required manner will – in sha
Allaah – be included in the words of the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Anaccepted Hajj brings no less
a reward than Paradise."
4 – Udhiyah (sacrifice)
One of the righteous deeds that bring a person closer to Allaah
inthese ten days is to slaughter the sacrifice and to look for a good,
fat animal and to spend money on it for the sake of Allaah.
Let us hasten to make the most of these great days, before the
negligent regrets what he did, and before he asks to go back and
receives no response.

A young man wants to follow the Sunnah but his father is Shi’i and wants to prevent him from following true guidance. What advice can you give?

I am 15 years old and I have just begun to adhere to the teachings of
Islam. The only source I have for learning the religion is Islamic
sites on the Internet, like this site of yours, because I do not have
anyone whocan take me to the mosque, which is 5 milesaway from where I
live and walking there is very dangerous. In addition to that, my
father wants to prevent me from using the Internet so that I will
focus more on my studies. He also hates meto read or learn from your
site, because he is Shi'i and he says that you will brainwash me. He
is insisting on teaching me the Shi'i madhhab, and even their way of
praying which I find is very different from the way other Muslims
pray. I do not know what I should do now. Can you advise me?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly, we praise Allah for having guided you tothe truth, and we ask
Him to make you steadfast and help you to attain all that is good.
Remember that you havebeen greatly blessed, and if you devote your
entire life and wealth for that purpose, that will be little in return
forthat blessing. Do you know how many millions of people of your
father's background worship rocks and human beings? Do you know that
all these people believe that the Qur'aan is distorted and they regard
the Sahaabah as kaafirs, apart from a fewof them? Do you know that
these people have revived the shirk of Jaahiliyyah and added more
forms of shirk thanwere known in the past?
We do not call people to anything except worshipof Allah, may He be
exalted, and we also call people to venerate and respect the Prophet
(blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) and not to impugn his
honour or slander his Companions. As we love all of the Sahaabah and
pray that Allah be pleased with them, and we seek to draw closer to
Allah by loving them, we also love and respect the people of the
Prophet's household (Ahlal-Bayt), and we seek to draw closer to Allah
by loving them.
Secondly:
With regard to your dealings with your father, what we advise you is:
1. Be kind in your dealings with him as much as possible.
2. Strive to serve him as much as you are able, and do not spare
any effort in doing so. Do not withhold any help orkind treatment from
him.
3. Focus on your studies and do not let your neglect of them be a
cause of you losing your religious commitment. What we understand from
your message is that your father wants to take steps to prevent you
from accessing our site and other beneficial Islamic sites because of
your studies. So do not give him that excuse; study and progress in
your studies; close the door to your father's shaytaan so that he will
not be able to make the issue of your studies a means of preventing
youfrom following true guidance.
4. Do not make an open show of visiting useful Islamic websites in
front of him, and do not make an open show of your following the path
of Ahl al-Sunnah in front of him. Even more important is not
arguingand debating with regard to good matters, because doing that
openly may motivate him to prevent you from following the path of true
guidance.
5. Pray for him and forall of your family to be guided to the
right path.Strive to make this du'aa' when you are prostrating and
during the last third of the night.
6. Finally, we advise you to use wisdom in dealing with your
father. If he teaches you to pray in the Shi'i manner and you cannot
reject it, then accept it from him and pretend toagree with him, but
prayin the manner established in the sound Sunnah. With regard to the
way the prayer is done, the matter is broad in scope in sha Allah, and
you come under the heading of one who is forced to do something. You
are at anage when you are not old enough to separate from him, so be
patient until the time comes when you can leave, then if Allah guides
your father before that, you can stay with them, or you can leave and
live independently, so as to protect your religious commitment.
And Allah knows best.

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What if you find a watch in the sand?

Suppose you find a watch in the middle of a desert. What would you
conclude? Would you think that someone dropped the watch? Or would you
suppose that the watch came by itself?
Of course no sane personwould say that the watch just happened to
emerge from the sand. All the intricate working parts could not simply
develop from the metals the lay buried in the earth. The watch must
have a manufacturer.
If a watch tells accurate time we expect the manufacturer must be
intelligent. Blind chance cannot produce a working watch.
But what else tells accurate time? Consider the sunrise and sunset.
Their timings are so strictly regulated that scientists can publish in
advance the sunrise and sunset times in your daily newspapers. But who
regulates the timings of sunrise and sunset? If a watch can not work
without an intelligent maker, how can the sun appear to rise and set
with such clockwork regularity? Could this occur by itself?
Consider also that we benefit from the sun only because it remains at
a safe distance from the earth, a distance thataverages 93 million
miles. If it got much closer the earth would burn up. And if it got
toofar away the earth would turn into an icy planet making human life
here impossible. Who decided in advancethat this was the right
distance? Could it just happen by chance?
Without the sun plants would not grow. Then animals and humans would
starve. Did the sun just decide to be there for us?
The rays of the sun would be dangerous for us had it not been for the
protective ozone layer in our atmosphere.The atmosphere around earth
keeps the harmful ultraviolet rays from reaching us. Who was it that
placed this shield around us?
We need to experience sunrise. We need the sun's energy and it's light
to see our way during the day. But we also need sunset. We need a
break from the heat, we need the cook of night and we need the lights
to out so we may sleep. Who regulated this process toprovide what we
need?
Moreover, if we had onlythe sun and the protection of the atmosphere
we would want something more-beauty. Our clothes provide warmth and
protection, yet we design them to also look beautiful. Knowing or need
for beauty, the designer of sunrise and sunset also made the view of
them to be simply breathtaking.
The creator who gave uslight, energy, protection and beauty deserves
ourthanks. Yet some people insist that he does not exist. What would
they think if they found a watch in the desert? An accurate, working
watch? A beautifully designed watch? Would they not conclude that
there does exist a watchmaker? An intelligent watchmaker? One who
appreciates beauty? Such is God whomade us. SubhanAllah!

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Hadees ~ Rain water, snow, and hail:

These substances are pure because Allah says so: "And sent down water
from the sky upon you, that thereby He might purify you..." (al-Anfal
1), and"We send down purifying water from the sky" (al-Furqan 48).
This is also supported by the following hadith: Abu Hurairah reported
that the Messenger of Allah, upon whom be peace, used to be silent
between the (opening) takbir of the prayer and the verbal Qur'anic
recitation. Abu Hurairah asked him, "O Messenger of Allah, may my
father and mother be sacrificed for you, why do you remain silent
between the takbirand the recital? What do you say(silently during
that time)?" He said, "I say, 'O Allah, make a distance between me and
my sins similar to the distance you have made between the East and the
West. O Allah, cleanse me of my sins in the manner that a white
garment (is cleansed) from dirt. O Allah, wash my sins from me with
snow, water, and hail."' This hadith is related by the "group", except
for at-Tirmizhi.

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He withheld from her many details about himself and his family; should she ask for a divorce?

I met my husband at work, we became friends and he had asked me to
marry him;although he lived on his own at the time and was not keeping
in touch with his parents. The story that he told mewas incomplete; he
had told us about his abuse as a child although did not advise that
his mother also beat up his father, on a regular basis. My parents
objected to his parents not being involved in the wedding, although
agreed eventually,based on what my husband had told them about the
parents being well educated with good careers. My husband kept the
details to himself in the fear of my parents not letting him marry me.
Also, because of an abusive childhood,my husband got involved in bad
habits when he left home at the age of 19 ; to cure his depression he
had taken up the hobby of pot smoking. When I methim, I felt bad for
him and after much speculation, agreed to mary him on one condition,
that he wouldgive up pot smoking.
7 years and two childrenlater, last yr, I find out alldetails on how
his parents and other familyis,(that his mother is a sadist)& also
discovered that he still smokes up on rare occasions.
This puts me off completely and I am not attracted o him anymore. I
discussed thiswith him in details and when I asked him to promise him
not to smoke weed again, he exclaimed that he cannot promise me this.
This breaks my heart, I feel like I was taken advantage of, and was
very naive to have believed in him. I regret my decision and think I
could have done so much better than him. We dont make a good
couple...because of his lifestyle pre-marriage, he is overweight and I
find it hard to feel attracted towards him.
Mind you he does pray maghrib at the mosque every now and then.
Please advise if I am crazy for thinking this and should I just move
on ignoring this.
Praise be to Allaah.
With regard to your husband smoking hashish (weed, pot), or consuming
other intoxicants or drugs, thisrequires a great deal of struggle and
advice, andseeking help from good and righteous people, sothat he can
give up this evil habit. If you find that he responds and is sincere,
this is what you want, but if you do not get that response from him,
then in that case there is no doubt that you have the right to askfor
a divorce and to annull your marriage with him.
But in fact dealing with this matter requires looking at various
aspects of your life, including your children if you have children,
andwhat will happen to them after this divorce; will you be able to
take care of them and look after them, or not? If youdo not have
children, then the matter is easier.
You mentioned that he prays. If he prays regularly or he prays most of
the time, but he does not pray in the mosque, then even though he has
done something reprehensible, there is still hope for him so longas he
still prays.
But if he does not pray at all, there is nothing good in him for you
and such a person does not deserve to have you staywith him.
See the answer to question no. 47335 and 172999 .
We advise you to fear Allah, may He be glorified and exalted.
Fulfilling the rights of Allah and obeying Him, and fulfilling the
husband's rights, are among the most important means of solving
marital problems. Moreover you should understand that whatever trials
befall an individual in his wealth, his family or his child, may stem
from himself in the first place: "And whatever of misfortune befalls
you, it is because of what your hands haveearned" [ash-Shoora 42:30].
So we advise you to be patient with your husband whilst continuing to
offer sincere advice and praying for him, until Allah sets him
straight. Please see the answers to questions no. 9497 , 142326 and
32450 for means that will help you to deal with the problems you have
mentioned.
If he mends his ways, all well and good; otherwise you can ask for a
divorce if you cannot be patient with your husband's annoyances and
can no longer carry on living with him, or if you fear for yourself,
your religious commitment oryour children if you stay with him.